Gadget

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Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Another adoption milestone

Today was a good day, soo good it brought tears.
Today we went to the Department of Children Services for Step #1 towards the finalization of our adoption that will consummate on August 31st. Today was like a big hug for Adam and I. Our AFS worker was there and she just adores our kids. Our CPS worker was there, who again told everyone how far we had come and told everyone how much we had grown and the great things she had seen out of Ribbit and Goober. A big wig CPS worker was there to give us definitions, medicaid info, explain what will happen if and when we leave Texas and so forth. A surprise visitor greeted us when we got there and recognized Goober immediately. It was his old caseworker. As an adoption parent (probably any parent) you tend to freak out when a stranger recognizes your kid but you don't recognize them. She had tears in her eyes and asked him if he remembered her. When he said No, she said "good". She has been with the kids since day one and wanted to come meet their family and see their happy ending.
During the meeting I was on the verge of tears. We learned more information about their birth mother and potential father(s), much more than I wanted to know. I eventually asked them to stop talking about her because a) i couldn't handle thinking of what my kids have been through b) i won't be lying when I tell Goober that I don't much and c) today was supposed to be a happy day. They understood but I also told them if and when Goober wanted to know or if genetic problems started to arise then we would call, otherwise we have all the history we want and we have their written history that we have already read and they printed out the rest of it for us to read when we can.
The kids did great during the meeting, Goober found a tablecloth and built a fort in the back of the conference room....shocking right. They smiled everytime Ribbit called out "mommy" or "daddy" and would run to show us something. Goober told them the new middle name he chose and everyone thought it was great that he was honoring his dad.

To be honest, I was nervous about today. Last week when I got onto Goober he looked at me said " I dont want to be adopted, I want to live with my mom". As I pulled the knife out of my heart, I took a deep breath and asked God for direction. I then turned to him and said " You will always love and miss her, I think that's great, it means that you are a loyal person. However, when you say that to me out of anger it doesn't sound genuine and it becomes disrespectful because you are trying to hurt mom. I love you to much and I know you love me and that in your heart you don't want to hurt me". About 10 minutes later he came and found me and said " well I don't want to live with her, I just miss her". We had our usual cry time about her and how good of a mom she was and how she just made some bad choices. I think he is finally processing alot of things surrounding the adoption and its becoming very very real to him. I also think he is a 7 year old boy who knows how to push his moms buttons. I told him that even bio kids sometimes tell their birth parents that they don't want to live with them ....but only in anger and only to hurt their feelings. He hasn't said it since and like I said, he was in such a good mood today and all we talked about was adoption!!!

We are well on our way to becoming an "official" family of 4!!!!! In our hearts we already are and have been since Feb. 6th though!

2 comments:

  1. They are seriously cute...and I think a few tears slipped out when I read this! I see kids taken out of homes in the hospital and lately my prayer has been to please let someone out there like you and Adam get those sweet babies and give them a good life. So happy for you guys!

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